Quick note before we jump in. The Optimistic Outlook book is now available on Amazon. It brings together the best posts from the last year of this newsletter. If you or someone close to you enjoys short inspirational stories, it makes a perfect Christmas gift.
Enjoyment Has a Rule
Life is better when it is enjoyable. But enjoyment comes with a set of rules.
Dr. Arthur Brooks said it perfectly.
“Want to enjoy your life? Here is the rule. If there is something that gives you pleasure, and you are using it alone, you are using it wrong.”
He continued.
“It is not a perfect rule because there are things that bring you pleasure that you can do alone that are not problematic. But if you take the things that bring you pleasure and you make them social, do them with love, use your brain, and manage your pleasures, you will create more happiness.”
Go ahead, Dr. Brooks. If you are using it alone, you are using it wrong. It is a simple lesson about enjoyment that comes with profound implications.
I tried teaching it to my 13-year-old this way. Sitting in the corner playing an iPad game by yourself is a violation of the rule. Playing an Xbox game with friends is not. The activity might be similar, but the experience is completely different. One isolates you, yet the other connects you.
Like most rules, there are exceptions. But this one kind of blew my mind. And regardless of your age, it will make you think. More importantly, if you apply it, it will make you happier.
Pleasure shared becomes joy.
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Use Your Gifts,
John Eades
Creator, The Leadership Lens & The Optimistic Outlook